Confused Or Liberated?

The rules of growing up are changing.

When Britney croons ‘I am not that innocent’ and gyrates to it or there is a constant bombardment of sexual images on our TV screens, these people tend to become role model for teens. With overt display of sexuality, is this generation losing childhood and innocence sooner?

And this question is not just for Indian teenagers but also in the west. The oh-so-forward-looking America which we see in ‘Sex and the City’ or any such show does not reflect the true middle class America which is quite conservative. And has equally worried parents. Read this.

Leaving aside morals for the moment, because morals are different for different people, I wonder what is the psycological impact on teenagers as they are growing up so fast. What about confused and conflicting ideals? Are we aping the 'west' without realizing the problems teens there are grappling with?

I am not here to talk about what is right and what is wrong. Because right and wrong cannot be defined by one and accepted by others. Neither do I take a moralistic stand as I believe in the adage 'to each his own'. But I still want to ask- are todays's teens liberated or confused?

I leave this open to debate.

Update: Bloggers take on the issue

Amar Says
I think its tendancy of grown ups to think that new generation is going wrong way and they have lost values. I agree that things have changed, I agree that they are exposed more to sexuality but at the same time we must accept that they are more focused about what they want. There is one section in each generation who are hard working and achievers. Maturity brings wisdom and trusting the child is important.

Maddy Says
I think the teens are ‘all there’ and know how to get what they want – little to early in their lives for anyone’s comfort and least of all their own. The reasons can be many – aping the ‘west’ / USA - which have no culture of its own, too much exposure at an early age, peer pressure, lack of proper guidance, etc. Reasons for ‘confusion’ are many but still the teens would like to call themselves ‘liberated’! Why? Guess maybe because being ‘liberated’ means to be seen doing all the IN things – following latest fashion trends, brand names, being seen at the correct places with the correct people, sex, alcohol, drugs, etc…

Raghav Says
I think if each of us learns to take responsibility for our actions, then there should'nt be any problem. But the reality is we dont take the resposnibility for our actions often blaming parents, friends, relatives etc. We have to understand that Life gives us choices. We only have the freedom of choice. But we dont have control over the consequenses. So if a 13 year old wants to experiment with sex, then so be it as long as she or he takes responsibility for her/his actions. If a model wants to throw off her clothes in a song sequence, it's her choice to show off. It's the media's choice whether to show it to public or not and ultimately its our choice whether to see it or not. Whether you like it or not, its a natural evolution of human being that you move from a controlled environment to an environment where you need freedom. Parents need to accept the reality.

Harshal Says
We are liberated and thus a bit confused since we wanted to do everything ourselves sometimes we get lost. True, the crap shown on TV these days does make the child lose its innocence fast. Hopefully they will realise it quickly. As far as the west being an influence, I say east meets west and all hell breaks lose. Why are we so hell bent in copying everything they do when they are trying to copy us? I prefer an american attitude with indian traditions.

Lostpatrol53 Says
The young today have greater pressures than their parents. Not to belittle the parent generation, who had their own struggles and chose to generally live in the future and foregoing personal bliss. This was easier in the absence of overt exrternal titillations. Today, coping with with the inernal demons is a lot tougher.

Bhushan Says
There's is no doubt that today children tend tend to lose their innocence much too early. I will attribute this to our wildly aping the US - I repeat the US and not he west. US has no history from which a culture arises unlike any other country. And it is observed that any culture which can balance itself beween traditions and modernism progress a lot. Instilling traditional values in new generation from begining will impart them an identity which they lack at present which creates confusion and they will be able to choose between right and wrong.


Nysa Says
When I was passing thru this age, I was told by my parents that everything is neither good nor bad - its upto you to decide what is good for u n bad for you. Ofcourse the media exposure was also less. About casual sex - it is statistically proved that today 11-14 yrs of children are no more bacchas. They want to experiment everything they come across, unaware of the consequences. Its quite alarming that todays teens are much more grown up mentally than us, aware of things, possess just half the knowledge , which makes them curious and later on regret.

Godolphin Says
These young adults cannot be termed exactly as confused..they know about everything and also dont value morality as much as we do.

Saumya Says
Not confused not clueless plain dumb is what I would say. In west, the parents are too bewildered or bored or on drugs and cant be bothered two hoots about their kids. As far as they are concerned rude kids, teenage pregnancies, teenage crime is all the governments fault – but IDIOT indians do not see that. Kids who are now over exposed to the western world only see the freedom an average teenager has but the opp side is not visible to them.

Rajesh (Kachra king) Says
Since the cost of living has increased, celebrities have started wearing less and eating less (being socially conscious), the people should follow them :D

Karan Says
I agree that teenagers and even pre-teens are losing their 'innocence' much too early with the rapid bombardment of pictures, shows and teen 'idols' thrown on them from the west. Closer home while the likes of Mallika Sherawat may not be an idol, her provocative behaviour, item numbers, do leave a wrong message in impressionable minds. The difference is our strong family and cultural values. It is these very qualities that make us the best but this 'MTVisation' of Indian kids will make us lose that critical advatage.

Chin Says
Well! I think now a days teenagers assume that sex is "the" right thing to do! Doesn't matter with whom they sleep with and how many times. I wonder why only sex,alcohal,money are associated with hip attitude? Cashing on the liberty being given they keep experimenting with life and hence fall pray to stuff like mms scandal! Its fine to have sex as its a personal choice however there are other things out there to experiment like one can concentrate on sports,politics,news and many other fruitful things. I don't really know what would be the "right" way to nourish and educate teenagers!

Samy Says
I'd say they are confused and don't really know the true meaning of liberated. With the focus shone on sexuality in physical terms....young adults dont value their bodies or minds as much.

Max Says
Its wrong to be exposed to such influences at such an early eage when kids are easily impressionable, have lack of wisdom to decide whats right and whats wrong. The Role Models are are merely acting in the advertisement for money. What is shown on TV these days is porn and has an adverse impact on kids minds. Saying that morality and decency are subjective doesnt mean we take leave of our senses because kids are being influenced by the media. They are confused not liberated.

Rpramod Says
CONFUSED is my verdict. This is because the advent of western values require that things be looked at from better perspective and teens at their age are not mature enough to have the right perspective. As a result they end up doing too many things too early, thus reducing their childhood years and early burnout. The realisations dont come in time to remedy the flaws. Parents should fill in the gap by providing that much needed perspective through which their kids can decide.

Vrij Says
The result is 13-15 yr olds who are members of the following groups:
* Can u believe I never had a GF/BF ?
* Can u believe I never kissed?
* Can u believe I never had sex?

Tejbir Says
Sexuality was always there it was just that older generation was not open enough and they suppressed their thoughts and views, now its not suppressed and kids before maturity seem to be talking abt it which i think is being mature and will clear many misconceptions at an early stage but yes a wrong portrayal of the same is what is worrying! There is a difference between educating and tittilating

Skj Says
It is necessary to write and debate on these kinda important stuffs. Well, as per India's decades old policies - follow the mid-path.

Potato Says
Yes. We all have passed through our early vulnerable years and I often wonder what youngsters at the age of 13 or 14 think when they see so much on tv, read in newspapers, mags etc etc.. Many can be easily decieved into thinking that that sort of life is much more happier to live in..

Puneet Singh Says
I guess a bit of both. They are liberated because they are given a lot more freedom than their parents were, they now are no longer afraid to step outside their safe homes and match their wits against the best around the world. Confused - because when they meet other cultures, they want to embrace it as their own and then in the strain of maintaining decorum they are not sure to the extent of the embrace. It depends on an individuals preference and maturity level.

Frenchita Says
Everybody is learning from everybody ..west from east ..east from west. And cant keep down good comedy like " sex and...." down for long

Priya Says
Singers/actors will do nething to get publicity, n they have to keep "fresh" by changing their "image" from time to time (i.e. Britney going from being a doll to a sex kitten). Key is to teach the gurls to be able to differentiate between whats ok on TV is not really ok in real life. Magazines with airbrushed models have the same problem.

Savy the Supermom Says
I think they think they are cool only because of if "care a damn attitude"..it reeks all over. but more than them..the issues to be addressed are with the parents who have actually found their feet in two boats and are actually in the juggling act.. otherwise..i think the focus is there in the kids but priority given to personal needs to be addressed with them.

Sharad Says
They are partially liberated thats why they are confused.


Wise Donkey Says
I think kids today are just puppets whose strings are pulled by marketing giants. The role models are decided by cola companies. They have to be "cool" and cool is defined by what you eat, say and wear and not who you are. Kids are a reflection of the parents own insecurity. USA has become a symbol of what one should aspire to be, but the problems are not shown. If the Indian kids compare themselves with their western counterparts for freedom then they shud take responsibility and not expect their parents to sponsor their lifestyle and studies.

Bharati Says
I guess its "confused liberty" both from the from the parents perspective and from teh teenagers perspective. From parents perspective because they are confused abt the amount of liberty that is to be given and from teenagers perspective because they dont know how to make use of the partial liberty!!

Malini Says

Confused and clueless, and why only teens, its us too..guess in this "instant" age of changing ideals, what is true today will be a passe tomorrow...so we turn on to some other thing..endless quest for illusive goals.

Ghalib Fan Says
Todays the youth are blindly following the west....and a very much confused.. we should not forget our culture,whcih is far superior to them...... we should adopt their technologies but not their culture.......we should draw a line somwhere....

Originally posted on Monday, May 15, 2006 1:34 PM